Saturday, February 11, 2006

A musical tribute to Timothy T. Dingle.

We apologise for the length, shoddy verse, and tedium of this latest of Oscilnut's unfortunate song parodies, but since it led to important Comments, it has been left up rather than appended to the earlier Dinglegate article. -SXV


HIS POST, DOWN THE BOG,

"The School, she hangs her Head in shame
At Tim Dingle's serial lying disease
As this comedy starts with a shattered glass heart
And the moralising sermonic reams.
But no, no tears please
Nicked cocaine leads to career death
But it is desire that shepherds its certainty
As we shall see..."

He was a two-faced crap teacher snorting powder off mirrors
A royal cunt.
Far beyond the pale, typical Walter Mitty, with his morals for sale
Psycho-christian views, libertarian's nightmare...

He trawled across the internets looking to wet his dick...
Until She realised he was married, and was heartily sick.

That fateful eve when
Tim D. logged onto web dating
He quit his wife, family and blew
A small fortune on blow, cross-dressing and whores
And extramarital sex in a hotel room

Putting reason to flight
With his fantasy life
She saw "Tall James", mesmerised
By his seeming endless cash
And drugs-fuelled bash
Dirty weekends came fast
And faced with trouble and strife
He simply quit his wife
His Post, Down The Bog!!!
Flushed his career and left to rot
His Post, Down The Bog!!!

We discovered him there
Beneath the tabloid's stare
Red dress worn, qualms all torn
Lectures aside his lying bared
Claimed double crossed, his credibility lost
No doubt cursing "that horrendous mare"

He'd sworn her vows to stay faithful
His lust would stand, till his next mistress took his hand
Then this he pled, "Come back to me
My love for thee will last for hours, like ice out on the desert sand!"

The Pupils laughed so hard they cried
For he'd took their weed and sent them by
A hypocritical stance as he fucked off to France
And with their Mary Jane... danced...

A royal cunt.
Far beyond the pale, typical Walter Mitty, with his morals for sale
Psycho-christian views, libertarian's nightmare...

He did pimp out the school's walls to fund his sordid sin
While at the same time buying and selling skin

That fateful eve when
Tim D. logged onto web dating
He quit his wife, family and blew
His career for a fuck, and thus he came unstuck
Those who wish to mock him please form a queue...

Putting reason to flight
With his fantasy life
She saw "Tall James", mesmerised
By his seeming endless cash
And drugs-fuelled bash
Dirty weekends came fast
And faced with trouble and strife
He simply quit his wife
His Post, Down The Bog!!!
Flushed his career and left to rot
His Post, Down The Bog!!!


Apologies to Dani Filth for having associated an otherwise perfectly good bit of melodic black metal with that hypocritical penivore.

9 Comments:

At 1:28 am, Blogger Sable X. Veins said...

Ah, another interminable Oscilnut parodic lyric.

(He sighs.)

 
At 3:19 am, Anonymous Anonymous said...

what's a penivore?

 
At 3:01 pm, Blogger Withiel said...

Ahem. Yes. Penivore = eater of penises = sucker of cocks?

If so, can we have the site kept free of homophobic terms of abuse, by any chance. Furthermore, it might be better to append this post to the main Dinglegate post, as it is rather more of an appendage, as it were. Kthxbye.

 
At 8:30 pm, Blogger Oscillating Hazelnut said...

/me rolls eyeballs.

Have you never heard the metaphorical term "X fellates Y" indicating contempt for X because of a fanboyish devotion to Y?

 
At 11:38 am, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Very good lyrics, although I believe that you haven't quite captured the full evilness of the guy. I am acquainted with the whole story as I am close friend of the lady who had the courage to "out" Mr. Dingle. He has ruined her life for 4 years, and since the article, many other have come out of the woodwork. He is about to be declared bankrupt, and seemed to be living 10 lives, not a "double life". Some of his lies have been despicable and low (his step-mother dying, his involvement in the Tavistock Square bombing and others). The guy is a sociopath, and it's a miracle that he has held such a responsible position. Hopefully, thanks to this article, people who have been affected by him can start to move on, but don't underestimate the effect his lying has had on people around him.

Oh yes, I forgot to say, the article is completely true, but there is more. Let's hope it all comes out.

 
At 4:18 pm, Blogger Oscillating Hazelnut said...

His involvement with the July 7 bombings???

Did he claim to single-handedly evacuate everyone off the wrecked bus or similar?

I think we ought to be told.

Also, not meaning to be unfriendly, but could you drop a name (not necessarily a real one) with you next post?

 
At 6:12 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Apparently he told another woman that he was involved in the bus bombing, probably as an excuse for being absent for a few days. He claimed that a colleague of his died and he was treated in hospital but was released the same day.

This is not the behaviour of a normal human being, but of a complete freak.

Would be good to know if you guys have any gossip on him? Did his crazy behaviour spill over into his job?

By the way, if anyone had a grass tins that were confiscated, we could probably return them!

Oh, and the thing with the dress photo....he asked if he could wear it, and also quite liked it if female acquaintances could wear school uniform. If it wasn't so sinister, it could almost be amusing.

I can drop a name...I am The Gate.

 
At 1:41 am, Blogger Sable X. Veins said...

I have reposted The Gate's discussion with Mr. Hazlenut as a Dinglegate update at the top of the front page. I would appreciate it, Ms./Mr. Gate, if you could elaborate on your experiences in any way you feel comfortable with. It is important that as much light as possible is cast on Dingle's alleged hypocrisy and immorality.

 
At 7:02 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

My god, how many more of use are there out there who were royaly shagged by this guy?

 

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